Five bands/artists you've seen, but wish you hadn't.

It's a shameless rip-off, but should be entertaining.

Six by Seven (Tomorrow Never Knows fits over all of their songs, I found.)
Vai (Steve Vai's solo project, how crap could that be? No, it was worse.)
Babyshambles
Django Bates (modern jazz, "needed" a seperate mic for the alarm clock!)
Robert Plant (possibly with the Band of Joy at the Folk Fest)

hmmm.

Neil Innes
Roy Harper
Robin Williamson
the Boo Radleys
Richard Thompson

Did you see Neil Innes in Cambridge Sam? He did a gig a few years back at the Junction and I loved it! Barry Wom emerged from behind the bar at the Castle to drum and do a newspaper solo.

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The Neil Innes gig was at the Arts Theatre, quite a long time ago and sans Wom.

Berlin
Flock of Seagulls
Gypsy Kings
Altered Images
Weathergirls

This is a funny one because when at university I used to get sent tickets to review all sorts of rubbish. I've seen Bryan Adams, Babylon Zoo and the Spin Doctors but I don't regret seeing any of them because they (or the audience) were nearly always quite amusing.

However I can say I wish I'd never seen:
Sonic Youth,
The Cult,
John Cale
Jools Holland and his Blues Orchestra
The Jeevas

oh come on Altered Images has provided a talking point for years, bad as it was :) i don't remember flock of seagulls although was the same gig.

Nick Harper
Guilemots
Screaming Lord Sutch
Camel (Snow Goose tour)
Giveamanakick

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we/I've supported (but got paid to do so...) some bands I'd rather not have due to their poor (in my humble opinion) performance on that night

Racing Cars
a very very stoned Icicle Works
Hampsters
Glitterband (yikes...)
Merton Parkas (out of their heads on something, the guitarist asked me to tune his guitar for him repeatedly...)

as for paying to see someone and wishing I hadn't Terry Reid who I admire as a performer was pissed as a fart when I went to see him as was the late great John Martyn... both have produced amazing music but were on the night inebriated beyond hope...

I can only think of four:

Smashing Pumpkins (Reading Festival, 1995)
Hole (also Reading Festival, 1995)
Sleeper (The Junction, 1990s)
Crown of Thorns (The Junction, 1990s)

Sonic Youth are on my list too.
Beth Orton is the only gig I can recall
Pere Ubu doing some weird arty animation thing that they got paid a load of money to do but obviously hadn't rehearsed.
Faith No More was a disappointing gig for me
Hamsters in a crowded Boat Race was something I didn't particularly enjoy

New Kids on the Block (even though I got paid £20 for it)
Supergrass (I was on DJ duty that night)
Simply Red

...can't think of any others.

Also, Eat Static supported by Banco di Gaia at the Junction, late 1990s.

The Jeevas
Ocean Colour Scene
Sonic Youth @ Glastonbury
Babyshambles
Bleach @ The Junction in 1992
Lush @ The Junction in 1991 and 1992. They became a much better live band when they discovered Britpop in 1996.

As I recall, the two singers in Lush were very pretty though.

Emma was the best one.

Was the other called Miko or Kiki or something?

Miki Berenyi. She still has her own fansite and campain for her to return to music, bless. http://www.mikiberenyi.co.nr/

Most disappointing shows I've seen

Smog (love the records, both times I saw him he was terrible)
faith no more reading 90, V poor put me off them completely.

with the other spaces being taken by my own bands at many shows!

The Cult
Dr John
Gary Moore
Fairground Atraction
James (rest of the line up great)

Oh yeah, Smog - saw him in Nottingham and he was dreadful. Support was Joanna Newsome who no-one had heard of. This tiny elf got on stage and started doing this mental acappella and suddenly everyone started looking. She was very good. She was very dull last time I saw her, where she appeared to have turned into Tori Amos.

Lush in about 1996. Miki was totally hot but seemed to sing a semitone either side of the note.
Guns N' Roses 1994 at Milton Keynes bowl. Two hours late in the pissing rain and they played half their set acoustically sitting on a sofa.
The Horrors at Glasto.

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I saw them at the The Marquee. They were indeed dull,

I enjoyed The Cult when I saw them but they were followed by Gn'R so they were probably just good in comparison.

When I saw the Cult Ian Astbury spent the whole gig telling the audience off for allowing them to be the only British band on the bill, complaining about everything and he came across as a bitter old has been. When he wasn't talking he was singing lurgid AOR rock.

It was like watching Emerson Lake and Palmer playing on that punk bill at the 100 club.

I saw Death Cult with The Sisters of Mercy supporting. They were pretty good that night but I don't think Astbury engaged in any banter.

I enjoyed his funny dancing.

All the bands I sat through at Glasto '99 in order to be near the front when REM came on. Can't rememebr them all, but Bush and The Beautiful South definitely played. Horrible.

And Martin Carr, much as it pains me to say it.

^ That's how I ended up seeing Simply Red - waiting for them to finish before The Cure came on at Glastonbury.

Bow Wow Wow at the Corn Exchange is quite possibly the worst gig I have ever been to - would be quite happy to knock that one off my list.

^ Yes, that was particularly crap, wasn't it? I think it was the last one before the big refurbishment.

The only ones I can remember were
Fiver (though I did get to stand next to graham coxon) and
Cooper Temple Clause

Julian Cope, spoken word tour, Corn Exchange, 2000ish. I love Julian Cope/Teardrop Explodes but for some reason this was the only time I got to see him. I wished I hadn't.

I saw Cope doing a set of music in about 2004. He was rubbish then too. It wasn't entirely his fault, he had a session guitarist who played fast widdly solos all the way through every single song. It was like having a nice view of an alpine valley in Switzerland and then putting frosted glass in the window.

Seasick Steve
Leonard Cohen - nearly slit my wrists
Morrissey
Elbow
Chipmunk

I'm quite shocked that I left Leonard Cohen off my original list, actually. Unlike Lyndaa who, we assume, survived to the end, I'd have probably have had to leave for a chat with the Samaritans halfway through.

Only just survived. I do believe that I was waiting for Basement Jaxx to come on so didn't watch him by choice but simply so I got a good seat. Never again, even his lyrics tried to kill me.

I assume this was a festival then, and not some bizarre gig with Cohen supporting Basement Jaxx...?

I must second DJOMG's comment about the hotness of Miki Berenyi. Couldn't really sing though.

Ha ha, yes it was Glastonbury, probably around 3-4 years ago.

I still insist Emma was much better looking. http://www.flickr.com/photos/matthetube/2422060625/

She also couldn't sing though, as shown by her vocal at 0.33 in this video. http://youtu.be/umc2eCs7WRs

In that photo she looks like YOU!

For some reason, I've just remembered Salad. Not a great band, but another very pretty singer.

Yeah! Majine of something. Used to be an MTV VJ

Marijne van der Vlugt, the things I'd do to her VJ!

*bows head in shame*

Think she's in a band called Cowboy Racer or something now.

Salad made the most of the three ugly blokes standing at the back out of focus and the singer at the front in pics. They supported every band in the world in 1995 (including a great show with carter usm at the corn exchange). Reviewers got to use the "side Salad" pun a lot that year.

I still insist Emma was much better looking. http://www.flickr.com/photos/matthetube/2422060625/

You might find you need new glasses, young man.

Vickie Perks from Fuzzbox was also rather hot!

The New York Dolls two years ago at the Junction. Horrible.

I know the buggers keep dying but I saw more of the original NYD when I saw David Johansen (spelling) play with a band 30 odd years ago than were in the line up two years back.

All heavy metal gigs I've been to

Blur on the Rollercoaster tour. Put me right off them for years.
Iggy Pop at reading - mid 90s. The assembled band was rawwk. Terrible.

I used to see Mikki around London gigs a lot.

I've been told I was 'wrong' about this, but Suicide at ATP in 2005