SPIDERS

Hi i seem to be getting loads of spiders in my house i live near a river and i they seem to be big brown ones!!

is there any spider killer you can buy - all i can find is fly spray!

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Don't kill spiders!

No, they MUST be killed. Here's another reason why Charlie Brooker needs to be my second husband:

http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/story/0,,2161325,00.html

yeah! poor spiders!

What's the point of spiders anyway? They're just mobile nightmare units put on the Earth to eat flies and frighten people by scuttling out from under the TV stand and lolloping crazily toward you. Non-arachnophobes just don't get it. Fear of spiders isn't a choice, but a residual evolutionary trait that some people have and some don't, just as some people can fold their tongues and others can't. When I see a spider, I'm across the room before I know what's happened, like an animal running from an explosion. It's not learned behaviour, you patronising idiots. It's automatic code, hardwired into the brain. Some brains. My brain.

silly boy

that's no reason to murder the poor things

I mean seriously... surely he can afford to see Paul McKenna or something and get it sorted

No, he's right.

Oh, and please note I'm suggesting the use of lethal force as a default. None of this fannying around with pint glasses and sheets of paper and "putting him outside". He'll just crawl in again, stupid. If a murderer climbed through your window you wouldn't just "put him in the garden". You wouldn't rest until you saw his brains sloshed up the wall. It's the same with spiders. If it's not been reduced to a gritty, twitching smear, it's not been dealt with at all.

Oh, I love him so!

Equating spiders with murderers? Um... ok :D

I found a huge spider - the biggest I have seen in this country - last week when clearing the side shed out and getting readdy for a trip to the tip... it was in the wheelbarrow I was using and it crawled to the top of the barrow and just jumped off onto the gravel... I went to pick it up (I had gloves on - spiders DO bite) and it did this defence mechanism thing where it put it's legs up over its body... then when it unfurled and uncurled it looked like Alien... meaty little fella...

I keep seeing silverfish on the bathroom floor... I htink it's because it's heated and they like to zip around... question: What does a silverfish do?

Killing spiders because of a phobia? While we're at it let's ban heights, crowds and confined spaces!! :o)

Well quite!! If you have a phobia of crowds does that give you the liberty to take them all out with a machine gun? Tsk... ;)

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I think the one on the right was getting horny- it wasn't a fight! He looks like a male...the other is a female. They go onto female spider webs to make séxy but more often than not they get eaten for their efforts. They're (males) not usually that big in comparison- is it the perspective playing tricks?

(edited for stupidity)

They go onto female spider webs to make séxy but more often than not they get eaten for their efforts.

mwah ha ha, excellent... "hey baby, fancy getting jiggy"... *GULP*

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Oh, that's horrible Georgie. That kind of contradicts the whole "maggots only eat dead flesh" thing, doesn't it, from the other thread? Have you got a link to the giving up smoking article? Sounds like another one I would be able to relate to!

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http://www.guardian.co.uk/Columnists/Column/0,,2078802,00.html

I must confess I don't normally get scared of spiders, but if I'm messing with ancient cobwebs and a big daddy suddenly dashes out of its lair in the general direction of a part of me I might just twitch!!

Chocoholic- I'm pretty sure that's what was going on. Male spiders are more lanky than the females, and have things called polyps (I think) at the front which contain all of their sperm. These look a bit like fangs, but they're totally not.. He was probably trying to make a stealthy deposit in her special place without getting mistaken for a fly!

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